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Dear.... (xD)

Journal Entry: Wed Nov 11, 2009, 10:55 AM


Dear Splint:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'll join the monastery. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped outside chicago and I saw you sit on my avocado plant. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that I get turned on by garbage men. I'm returning your memories from military service to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I Was interviewed by the Times about Oprah Winfrey imitations.
Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,

Mar







1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister

2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes

3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife

4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out

5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed

7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service

9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college

10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked

11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whisky - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

  • Listening to: Break Me Shake Me - Puddle of Mudd
  • Reading: All's Quiet on the Western Front
  • Watching: Teeext mooove
  • Playing: I.T.
  • Eating: -stomach growl-
  • Drinking: Nothing

DON'T SHOOT ME, ANOTHER QUIZ. D:

Thu Sep 24, 2009, 7:07 PM
  • Listening to: Muuuuuuuse
  • Reading: All's Quiet on the Western Front
  • Watching: Teeext mooove
  • Playing: Iko
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: A&W Root Beer
LOL SORRY.
I'M SO FRIGGEN BORED. XD
DON'T JUDGE ME. X.X


----



Is taller than you: DC

Dresses Gangsta: OFF

Dresses Gothic: OFF

Dresses Skater: DC

Dresses Emo: DC

Dresses preppy: DC

Cuts themselves: OFF

Has green eyes: ON

Has blue eyes: ON

Has Brown eyes: DC

Has hazel eyes: ON

Drinks alcohol: DC

Smokes cigarettes: OFF

Smokes weed: OFF

Plays sports: DC

Calls you just to say hi: ON

Compliments you: ON

Good dancer: ON

Has piercings: OFF

Wears jewelry: DC

Has curly hair: DC

Has straight hair: DC

Has brown hair: DC

Has Black hair: DC

Has blonde hair: DC

Has Red hair: DC

No hair: OFF

Loyal: ON

Laid back: ON

Plays guitar: ON

Plays drums: DC

Plays piano: DC

Can draw: DC

Easily jealous: DC

Has a tattoo: DC

Has a lip ring: DC

Has a tongue ring: OFF

Nipples pierced: OFF

Goes to church: OFF

Hugs from behind: ON

Is original: ON

Makes eye contact on purpose: ON

1.How many crushes have you had since you were in kindergarten?
Duuuh....Uuuuh.
I don't count, wtf.

2.Who was your first kiss?
xD -snort-

3.Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
Ohgod, ew.

4.Favorite colors?
Dark red, teal.

5. What are you wearing right now?
....Clothes?

6. What is your favorite Christmas song?
...Hmm. Silent Night I s';pose. Or Greensleeves.

7. What is your favorite season?
Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh.
Fack.
I love all the seasons, idk. D:

8.What is your favorite ice cream?
Caramel<3

9. Do you like coffee?
Didn't use to. XD

10. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees?
BEARBEARBEAR. D:

11. What was the last book you read?
Feral.

12. Without looking, guess what time it is
...That's so hard to not look but I know it's almost 8 if not already 8. -looks- 8:04.

13. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
-points up-

14.What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
@#()%@#%& SHUTUP ALARM. -slam alarm-

14. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
Fuck society.
: D

15. How many tattoos do you have? Have you ever thought of getting one?
None but Idunno...Maybe. After I move out. xD Doubt I'd have the guts.

16. The glass half empty or half full?
I break the glass.
Bitch.

17.Who is pretty ?
...Everyone?
-dodges bullets-

18.What school do you go to?
STFU YOU STALKER.

19.Favorite types of shoes?
Nike I s';pose.

20.Do you have a best friend?
'Course. XD

God %(&@#%

Fri Sep 11, 2009, 7:58 PM
  • Listening to: Hanz Zimmer
  • Reading: I should be reading something
  • Watching: Nothing
  • Playing: Iko
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing
They fucking stole my car.
Out of the parking lot.
I don't even know who. Probably some stupid gang admission.
Two others got broke into but no mine got moved -_- to the other side of the school.

Probably were kids from my school doing it between classes and were trying to hurry so they had to move it to the other side of the school.
Bullshit.

We have cameras and we pay twenty bucks to park in that parking lot which is hard to just FIND a spot to park in that's reasonable. Not only that the staff get the only GOOD spots.

And the cameras weren't working. :/ I doubt they ever work. -sigh-

Apparently Honda Accords are the easiest to break into in the U.S.
How peachy.
All three cars were Accords. The two others got their stereos taken.
They couldn't get mine out 'cause my brother is pro and put it in the right way.
Idiots.
They ripped off the face of the stereo instead, bent the outside of it in their efforts to get it out.
I better get my fecking Red Hot Chili Peppers CD out in one piece. Or I'ma bust a cap. -.-;

Then they totally rendered the ignition to pieces and just used a screwdriver or something to start it up so they could move it. Since they didn't want to be seen or something, no offices on that side of the school.

Gah fuck the system. They probably won't get caught.

I forget if any fellow B-towners are watching me. Ones still in school.
Either way if you hear anything, please call me or myspace me. :/
I dunno.
I just dunno.
Except that I'm pissed.

Gonna' cost me around 300 bucks to replace the ignition because my dad wants a new one. But insists that I pay since it's my responsibility. (Car isn't even mine or in my name. o.o)
Can barely afford that right now.
Blah.

/end rant

Yes Another Quiz

Mon Aug 17, 2009, 12:51 AM
  • Listening to: Hanz Zimmer
  • Reading: I should be reading something
  • Watching: Nothing
  • Playing: Iko
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing
Yes



----



Stolen from :iconpoplet:


ANIME/MANGA NERD

[ ] You watch anime.
[ ] You read manga.
[ ] You buy/collect anime DVDs or manga volumes.
[ ] You own some other form of anime/manga merchandise.
[ ] You have referred to an anime character as 'hot' before.
[ ] You have cosplayed.
[ ] You have been to an anime/manga convention.
[ ] You have created/joined a fanclub for an anime/manga character.
[ ] You have created/joined a hateclub for an anime/manga character.
[ ] You have squealed when you found out somebody had the same name as an anime character you knew.
[ ] You enjoy drawing anime.
[ ] People you know know you as the 'anime' person.
[x] You know that it is pronouced 'mawnguh' and not 'manga' like it is spelled.

ANIME/MANGA POINTS: 1


ART NERD

[x] You like art.
[x] You actually consider yourself an artist.
[x] When using art supplies, the brand of them matters to you.
[ ] You have a favorite brand.
[x] You have asked for art supplies as a Christmas/birthday gift before.
[x] You give people your drawings as gifts.
[x] People actually ask for your drawings.
[x] You are known as 'the art person' at your school.
[x] Instead of just 'brown' or "pink', you'd be specific; it's 'sienna brown' or 'blush pink'.
[x] You have taken an art class outside of school.
[x] You have considered a career as an artist.
[x] Your school papers are always covered in doodles.
[x] You have a favorite artist.
[x] Your drawings have been framed.
[ ] You carry a sketchbook with you everywhere you go.

ART NERD POINTS: 13


MUSICAL NERD

[x] You play a musical instrument.
[x] You play more than one instrument.
[x] You actually really enjoy playing your instrument.
[ ] You've given your instrument a name.
[ ] You've participated in an extracurricular activity for your instrument.
[ ] You are known by what you play.
[x] You listen to classical music.
[ ] You are wondering whether that refers to the classical music genre or the classical music time period.
[x] You have a favorite composer.
[ ] All of your friends are from your band/orchestra class.
[ ] You write music.
[ ] You've had discussions with your friends about music; your favorite composers/instruments/musical time periods/key/etc...
[ ] You have considered a professional career with your instrument.
[ ] You are never nervous playing for other people.

MUSICAL NERD POINTS: 5


VIDEO GAME NERD

[x] You play video games.
[x] You own more than 4 different video game systems.
[x] You've had debates over which system is the greatest.
[x] You play video games every day.
[x] You have played a video game for over 10 hours.
[x] You have songs from your favorite video games on your MP3.
[x] You love to talk about video games.
[ ] You memorize the dates for when a new game is being released.
[x] People know you as the 'gamer' person.
[x] You spend more time on video games than you do hanging out with friends.
[x] Your gaming system is in your room.
[x] You have preferences when it comes to what company your game came from.
[x] You've had debates over which company is the best.
[x] You keep playing a game until you beat it.
[ ] It makes you angry when you found out somebody looked up cheat codes on the internet to beat their game.

VIDEO GAME NERD POINTS: 13


COMPUTER NERD:

[x] You use the computer every day.
[x] You have an account/username on some sort of social website.
[x] You go into random internet chatrooms.
[x] You spend at least 2 hours a day on the computer.
[x] You use computer faces; : D XD XP D: ^_^ >.> and etc.
[x] It is hard to go a day without using the computer.
[x] You spend time in online forums.
[x] In the forum/chatroom you use, you are known there by everyone else.
[x] You have friends you have only met online.
[x] You have/have had a girlfriend/boyfriend you have only met online.
[ ] You have actually met an online friend in person. (GODIWISH)
[x] U cn ezly rd 'txttlk.'
[x] You have said 'lol' or 'omg' in speech that is not online.
[x] You can type really, really fast.

COMPUTER NERD POINTS: 13


Roflol. XD

I couldn't help myself. DO IT.

Sun Jun 28, 2009, 8:28 PM
  • Listening to: Snow Patrol
  • Reading: The Invisible Man
  • Watching: Nothing
  • Playing: WoW -nerd-
  • Eating: Nothing
  • Drinking: Nothing
Stolen from :iconjaole:


Natural Hair Color:
[x] Brown - $100
[ ] Blonde - $50
[ ] Black - $15
[ ] Bald - $5
[ ] Other-$75

100

Eye Color:
[x] Brown - $1
[ ] Green - $75
[ ] Blue $50
[ ] Hazel $100
[ ] Other - $15

101

Height:
[ ] Over 7' - $200
[ ] 6'8" to 7' - $175
[ ] 6'0" to 6'7" - $150
[x] 5'5" to 5'11" - $75
[x]4'9" to 5'4" - $45
[ ] Under 4'9 - $45

176

Age:
[ ] 31 to 40 - $100
[ ] 26 to 30 - $75
[ ] 21 to 25 - $50
[ ] 19 to 20 - $25
[x] 0 to 18 - $100

276

Birth Order:
[ ] Twins or more than twins - $300
[ ]First Born - $300
[ ] Only Child - $250
[ ] second born - $150
[ ] Middle child-$100
[x] Last Born - $100
[ ] third born - $100
[ ] fourth born - $100
[ ] fifth born - $100

376

Drink?
[x] No - $400
[ ] Only Holidays - $250
[ ] Sometimes - $215
[ ] YES - $200
[ ] Only weekends - $350
[ ] Every other day - $50
[ ] Once a day - $15
[ ] I live from the bottle -$Bankrupt$

776

Vision?
[x] Perfect vision -$300
[ ] Need or have glasses/contacts but dont wear them - $200
[ ] No correction - $100
[ ] Glasses - $50
[ ] Contacts - $25
[ ] Surgical correction - $1

1076

Car(s) Color:
[ ] Pink - $2,000
[ ] Maroon - $800
[x] Gold - $700
[ ] Gray - $600
[ ] Blue - $900
[ ] Obsdian - $800
[ ] White - $475
[ ] Red - $400
[ ] Green- $350
[ ] Silver $300
[ ] Purple- $250
[ ] Metallic - $200
[ ] Yellow - $100
[ ] Primer - $75
[ ] Tan- $20
[ ] Rusted - $15
[ ] No Car - $0
[ ] Other - $ 50

1776

Shoe Size:
[ ] 13+ - $300
[ ]12.5 to 13 - $250
[ ] 11 to 12 - $700
[x] 7 to 10 - $500
[ ] Under 7- $550

2276

Favorite Color:
[ ] Black - $450
[ ] Green - $750
[x] Red - $600
[ ] Yellow -$475
[ ] Brown - $50
[ ] Purple - $225
[ ] White - $400
[ ] Aqua - $350
[ ] Orange - $300
[ ] Blue - $300
[ ] Pink - $100

2876

Did you use a calculator to add it all up?
[ ] Yes - $0
[x]no- $1000
[ ] on some - $550


Total : $3876

I feel expensive. -waggle butt-

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